I’m in Italy from 9/12 – 9/21. As you read this, I’m probably snapping pictures out the yang and eating gelato by the gallon. I’ve scheduled a few posts for you guys to read while I’m gone. I’ll still be checking email/reading comments/commenting on blogs when I can. Love you all!
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I wish this post could be filled with words/phrases like “sumptuous,” “benevolent,” and “I respectfully disagree with your opinion on [insert political issue here], because of the compelling research in [insert academic journal name here.]”
But it’s not.
Because it’s me.
So here are the 10 things I say basically every single day of my life:
1. “Totally.”
It’s my favorite adjective. I’m so articulate I can hardly stand it.
2. “Really?”
But not in a sweet, curious way. I usually say it in a bitchy rhetorical way. As in, “You think it’s okay for you to just grab my ass? Really?!?!?! Like, really?!”
3. “I’m hungry.”
Because I am. And everyone should know about it.
4. “I just can’t.”
I know this one is totally (see #1) popular, but I can’t help it!
5. “It’s ‘cause I’m a sassy bitch.”
I.e., my justification for everything.
6. “F-word.”
Except, I don’t say “f-word.” Luckily, I’m very good at regulating it when I’m in front of children, at school, at work, or in an otherwise inappropriate situation.
7. “I’m realllly craving ice cream. It must be my PMS.”
I’m like the girl who cried PMS. Nobody believes me when I’m actually PMSing.
Side note, go watch this video
8. “I love that/it/you so much I could just rip my face off.”
This one usually garners some confused looks.
9. “Douche.”
Or some other variation. Like douche bag, douche monger, douche-tastic, douche-strosity, douche-pocalypse, mayor of Doucheville, douche hole, etc., etc.
10. “I’m just gonna watch one more episode on Netflix.”
Famous last words.
Just feel lucky that I didn’t include sound bytes.
IN THE COMMENTS:
What words or phrases are way overused in your vocabulary? Do you have the mouth of a sailor who moonlights at a truck driver?
